The Great Balance

So here I am, juggling my writing schedule between fiction - book 2 of my Twin Ponds Maine Murder Mysteries and non-fiction -book 2 in the spiritual series; this one regarding empathy, with my spiritual journey.  I'm trying to learn the latest step in my spiritual path.  Imagine trying to be aware, in every moment of every day, how you use your energy.  In other words, do I draw my energy from other people?  Do I put expectations on others when all I really need to do is accept where they are at in their path and understand that it probably isn't where I'm at and be okay with that?  Do I do things because I expect something back?  Interesting and sometimes very tough questions that I'm grappling with as I try to further understand this thing we call life and life lessons.  The thought goes that ideally we get our energy from upstairs, or heaven, or whatever name you choose to put to the Great Beyond.  We shouldn't be drawing it from each other because that's what causes all the things I just brought up - expectations, disappointments, control issues, etc.  Think of those questions when it comes to the issue of love.  Brother, now that's a huge can of worms!  So many of us need to be validated in someway by our partner.  So many of us have these idealistic expectations of what love and a relationship should be.  I know, I'm guilty of this myself.  It didn't help growing up watching all those old Hollywood movies where romance was king and everything always ended with a neat bow as you and your lover walked off into the sunset together, never to have an issue or a problem.  Sigh.  If only...  But what I'm trying to do is look at the bigger picture.  Is it possible to be in a relationship and not need that validation?  To be able to love and accept the person for who they are, without pointing fingers at their faults and hoping they do the same to you?  Is it possible to be in a relationship and not depend on that other person for your energy?  Once again, it all comes down to energy, doesn't it?  How we use it, how we abuse it.  Even with my writing, I need to watch that I don't put expectations into it.  I create my stories, put them out there and try to let it go.  If they're meant to be read by a host of people, they will be.  If not, well, they do make a good doorstop.  Being a shaman has taught me that we have a foot in the material world, but also a foot in the spiritual world.  We are all connected.  As Shakespeare once wrote, "If you prick us do we not bleed? If you tickle us do we not laugh? If you poison us do we not die" - which shows the commonality in all of humanity, no matter race, creed, nationality. So here I sit, juggling writing and spirituality.  Trying to find the big picture and attempting to understand why the world is as screwed up as it is.  Maybe it's because we've forgotten that we don't need to take our energy from each other.  That we don't need to impose our energy on each other.  To heal and be secure and know there's something bigger at play here.  As a friend of mine is fond of saying, "A tree is happy being a tree.  A rock is happy being a rock."  Why can't we be happy being who we are?  And so the pondering continues...